Welcome to a Crazy World
Un neurone en trop dans une case en moins... Mais rien de bien méchant !
Vefblog.net
Créer un blogIt's the END...
Voilà voilà...
Je me suis dit que j'allais quand même vous avertir... Vous, petits lecteurs anonymes...
Je vais fermer les portes de ce vefblog. Bon il sera toujours mais pas à jour. J'ai, depuis un bout de temps déjà, pris mes envols vers un site privé, sans pub, plus libre :) Avec un peu plus de posts qu'ici mais le ton reste le même (je n'ai pas changé ;) )
Je vous invite TOUS sans exception là-bas.
Et j'espère vous y retrouver également ;)
A tout bientôt ! 
Tiff
Mon bébé, le retour
J’ai ressorti mon bébé (euh par contre je ne sais plus le numéro de celui-là) mais je parle de mon bébé roulant, ma moto !
ça faisait un bail que je ne l’avais plus utilisée parce que cet hiver a été plutôt long et elle a dû faire un petit tour chez le docteur. Toute belle, toute propre, toute réparée, je l’ai reprise ! \o/ Alors plein de sensations m’avaient manquées :
- Le picotement sur les jambes lorsqu’il fait froid
- Les vibrations qui partent du bout des doigts
- Le vent s’engouffrant juste dans le cou (si.. surtout quand tu tournes la tête sur l’autoroute…)
Whééé ! Non mais le pire, ce sont les vibrations. J’avais oublié ça. ça part vraiment du bout des doigts jusque dans les épaules et puis ça descend dans le dos… Hum. Anticipons ! Je vais avoir besoin d’un massage. Tu viens m’en faire un ?
Sinon c’est cool. Le côté ‘je salue l’autre motard’, le côté ‘je peux me parquer en face de l’endroit où je vais’ et le côté ‘je peux remonter le long des files de voiture au feux’ Ah non non ça je fais pas c’est interdit… 
Bon si je pouvais avoir une combinaison qui s’enlève en 3 secondes et qui me protégerait du froid et des chutes ça serait bien. Parce que je prend bien 3-4 minutes pour me préparer. Bottes, écharpes, veste, casque et gants.
Tel robotcop, catwoman, Angelina Jolie, Monica Bellucci, une femme sur sa moto (plus facile), je sillonne les routes (sur la route.. tada tadadadammm *Shut UP*).
Le top c’est quand même d’arriver à accéder au garage du travail sans prendre 10 minutes. Parce qu’il faut un badge. Déjà en voiture, on râle, on doit baisser la vitre (en hiver il fait aussi froid), retrouver le badge, le sortir et le passer devant l’appareil. Mais en moto. Mouahahah…. Déjà l’embrayage il est à gauche (tout comme l’appareil, ben oui forcément, du côté conducteur) alors si je veux utiliser ma main gauche, je dois mettre ma moto au point mort.
Ensuite je dois sortir mon badge de ma veste (avec les gants d’hiver, je te défie…) et là on attend que la barrière s’ouvre (ce qui est hyper rapide une fois l’accès autorisé) seulement voilà… Il faut redémarrer.
Je te rappelle la situation. Je suis au point mort, badge dans la main gauche et j’ai besoin de cette main gauche pour appuyer sur l’embrayage et pouvoir faire avancer la moto !
Le badge, je le mets où ? (personne ne répond ‘dans ton cul’ merci 
) Je ne peux même pas le mettre entre mes dents (c.f. article
précédent) parce qu’avec le casque c’est impossible (j’ai tenté,
essaie… toi aussi). Alors je le garde en main mais ce n’est pas
pratique pour bien gérer l’embrayage.
Le must serait qu’on m’ouvre la porte quand j’arrive. Ben oui attend quand même c’est le strict minimum non ? Non… Bon… Alors quand j’arrive, je prie pour qu’une voiture arrive en même temps que moi. Et si c’est le cas, c’est le SUMMUM ! Ma journée est bien partie. Comme ça je peux la suivre de tout près, s’il faut j’accélère même ! Et je peux, comme ça, rester les mains sur le guidon tout du long. Whééé…
Ou alors, si tu as une solution plus pratique que je pourrais utiliser. Je t’avertis de suite. L’accrochage du badge à l’extérieur de ma veste.. Je faisais ça un temps. Beaucoup plus pratique en effet et plus rapide (avec un zip c’est nickel) Mais… Mais un jour… J’ai perdu ce même badge… si… *paix à son âme* entre chez moi et le boulot, il a disparu… Il ne me restait plus que l’attache… Pas très utile.
Je compte sur TOI pis toi et toi aussi pour me trouver une solution !
Phrase du post : Come by later and I’ll tie you up. [G. House]
Bizoooouxxx tout plein ! 
Bientôt plus que sur www.tiffstouch.ch
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Sinon c'est vrai que l'accrochage du badge à l'extérieur, c'est le top... mais faut trouver comment bien l'attacher, genre avec une épingle de sureté...
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+ 1... 
+ 1... 
J'ai eu un an de plus ! Que ça se sache ! Nan mais oh (habituellement abrégé : 'Nanméoh') !
Donc j'ai officiellement 23ans et pleins de gens hyper cool autour de moi. Non mais MERCI à tous ceux qui ont pensé à moi en ce jour J. Je vais commencer, comme à l'accoutumée, par dresser la liste des 5 premiers (Bah oui, ils y en a qui se battent alors autant qu'ils soient noté quelque part). C'est partit ! *cherche sa feuille*
- Nono (il était plus 11h59 que 12h00 mais j'ai accepté)
- Elo
- Sweety
- Manue
- Cynthia
Si je compare à l'année dernière... Il n'y a personne qui était là les deux fois. Alors ça veut dire deux choses : soit mes amis ne font l'effort qu'une année... soit je n'ai pas les même ami 
Bon j'avoue qu'il y en a plein qui dorme... Je ne leur en veux pas
Le top de l'année sera quand même attribué à Elo qui me l'a souhaité par tous les moyens possible et inimaginable (il ne lui manquait plus que le pigeon voyageur !) L'affiche totale est attribuée à l'équipe de Rictus....
Ecoute ça :
Ceci étant fait. Je peux t'informer qu'il m'est arrivé un truc de ouf ! Non, ne t'emballe pas, rien de spécial finalement mais... On m'a déchiré juste un petit morceau de peau. La lèvre inférieure. Mine de rien ça fait mal ! Sans prévenir, c'était hyper violent !
Je circulais doucement dans un parking quand j'ai voulu enlever la carte (du même parking) d'entre mes lèvres. Si si. Tu vois très bien le truc. On appuie sur le bouton, on redémarre, on ne sait pas très bien où mettre cette foutue carte alors on la prend discrètement entre les lèvres et là... Aïe... Il suffit de peu. Juste qu'elles soient légèrement humide et là pouf, la carte se colle....
Et pour l'enlever... Je ne t'explique pas. On ne s'y attend pas vraiment, ce n'est qu'une simple carte, rien de plus. Hé ben non ! L'heure de vengeance a sonné ! Je vais, dès à présent, mordre violemment dans ma carte de parking... Hum... Je me soigne, ne t'inquiète pas.
J'ai une vidéo pour toi ! Tu sais que j'aime le théâtre (ou pas), ben j'adore l'impro :love: Pourquoi ? Pour... Arriver un jour peut-être à faire ça :
Phrase du poste : Look but don't touch unless you want to loose your innocence. [Lisa Edelstein]
Bon weekend !
http://www.tiffstouch.ch
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1. anaflore le 03-04-2009 à 20:19:27 (site)
et bien drole d'histoire que cette violence gratuite lol bon wk et bonne vengeance mdr
2. safa le 08-04-2009 à 01:10:03 (site)
pu*** j'ai pensée a autre chose , tiens...dans un parking......... On m'a déchiré juste un petit morceau de peau. La lèvre inférieure (la grande surment). Mine de rien ça fait mal ! Sans prévenir, c'était hyper violent ! eeeeeeeeeeeeuh bref you are crazy , sinn joyeux annoch 
3. Tiff le 08-04-2009 à 14:51:56 (site)
@Ana : mdrrr la vengeance est PROCHE ! 
@Safa : Oh tu sais, il y a des choses sous-entendues dans mes textes, tu n'es pas totalement à côté de la plaque xD
Vivement 40 ans !
Enfin… Il parait qu’on dit ça uniquement quand on est jeune ! Globalement, pas très envie de vieillir non plus mais… avec une collègue-dont-je-ne-citerais-pas-le-nom-Véro, on a remarqué que nos amies les stars féminines sont injustement sexy à 40 ans.
Moi ? Jalouse ? Oui ! Et alors ?
Ces femmes qui respirent la sensualité, qui donnent un air de femmes fatales alors qu’à 20 ans elles n’étaient pas forcément des plus sexy… Forcément, moi, je me pose des questions. Pas toi ?
Je vais te montrer des exemples de femmes que je considère comme sexy. Bon, tous les goûts sont dans la nature, il se peut que nous n’ayons pas les mêmes. Et si tel est le cas, n’hésite pas, internaute chéri, de me montrer TES exemples de femmes fatales.
Il y en a que j’ai déjà plus ou moins mentionnées et d’autre… Non ! On commence par une star française !
Sophie Marceau
Et je voudrais pas dire… Mais elle est née en 1966… Si tu n’as pas envie de calculer ça fait qu’elle aura 43ans en fin de cette année… Je ne sais pas si c’est moi qui vieillit ou autre mais je la trouve très très bien !
La 2ème femme que je vais te présenter est un poil plus jeune… Ben oui ! Elle est de 1967 (et comment c’est hyper important les années !)
Kate Walsh
Je l’ai forcément connue dans Grey’s Anatomy et là je regarde la
série où elle est le personnage principal, Private Practice. Ce n’est
pas du tout le même style que Sophie Marceau, je te l’accorde, mais je
ne crois pas avoir un style de femme 
Kate est beaucoup plus pulpeuse d’ailleurs, elle a un décolleté qui en ferait pâlir plus d’un… Non ! Je ne vous montrerais pas ses seins. Cherchez vous-même. Cette femme, en plus d’être physiquement avantagée, est hyper folle (tu sais que c’est un compliment pour moi)… Elle a fait un talk show vêtue uniquement d’une serviette de bain. Elle semble être remplie d’humour et je regarde toujours avec plaisir ses interviews.
Et mon n°1 féminin… Tu le sais… THE femme qui pourrait
éventuellement me faire douter de mon hétérosexualité (il faudrait que
je la voies en vrai pour confirmer le truc )
Lisa Edelstein
ELLE !
Lisa (oui je l’appelle par son prénom, ça fait style ‘je la connais’) est née en 1966 également. *Soupir* Non mais vous vous rendez compte ? Je lui en train de vous parler de femmes ! Non mais Mme Edelstein est aussi complètement barge, a un humour que j’apprécie et a un corps de rêve !
Pour ceux qui ont vu la saison 4 ***Warning Spoiler*** ou pour ceux qui ne regardent pas House (sacrilège !) Elle a fait une scène de strip-tease (pas complète, désolé messieurs) et il y a de quoi vouloir les mêmes proportions corporelles.
Attention vos yeux ! Je n’ai pas la scène officielle en VO mais voici une vidéo de fan.
Et il parait que TF1 va supprimer cette scène 
Alors quelqu’un l’a mise en VF (attention pour les admirateurs de la VO, ça fait mal à entendre) sur dailymotion mais il faut être enregistré car c’est classé “contenu explicite” mais rien de bien méchant.
Je finirai par conclure que c’est à cause de ses femmes-là que j’ai
une légère envie d’avoir 40 ans… Mais il parait que ça ne fonctionne
pas pour tout le monde 
Et là ça serait dommage de prendre 17ans d’un coup si c’est pour ne pas avoir un corps de rêve. Nan mé ho ! Quand même 
T’en penses quoi ?
Phrase du post : La beauté n’est qu’un piège tendu par la nature à la raison. [Voltaire]
Commentaires
1. esuna le 23-03-2009 à 20:10:44 (site)
Coucou ! je visite tous les blogs pour les awards (suis courageuse et patiente ! lol) et ton blog est bien sympa.
Faut pas être pressée de vieillir, ça passe tellement vite !
A bientôt si tu veux bien 
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Ceci est une note 'tribute' au chocolat. Le seul et unique amant qui est resté avec moi tout ce temps (et Morphée... mais, lui, il ne compte pas, il me trompe). Le fait que j'habite en suisse n'arrange rien. J'essaie même pas de me soigner. Enfin si, j'avais fait un test une fois. Sans sucre pendant un mois...
Ben le pire ce sont les boissons sucrées et le chocolat.
En tout cas pour moi.
Voici un rayon de chocolat dans un magasin suisse... Non mais vous voyez ? Comment voulez-vous résister à ça ? En fermant les yeux ?
Beaucoup trop dangereux, on risque de faire une collision de chariot et après on devra débattre s'il y a priorité de droite ou non dans les magasins.
D'ailleurs je me suis toujours posée la question.
Mise en situation :
Vous êtes dans une grande surface, dite, magasin d'alimentation (pour ne citer personne). Vous arrivez à un carrefour. A votre droite, une mère avec ses enfants. Devant vous, un pépé avec le chariot presque vide. Vous voulez tourner à gauche mais la mère semble vouloir s'engager.
Que faites-vous ?
Arrrg ! Putain ! Quelque chose me revient en tête,
on devait se tutoyer nous ! 'Scuse-moi internaute chéri, je suis de
nature trop polie (Que personne ne rigole svp).
Donc, disais-je, que fais-tu ? A partir de là, il y a plus ou moins 2 solutions. Soit tu laisses passer tout le monde (histoire de ne pas faire de jaloux) soit tu forces le passage. De quoi ? Ce que je fais moi ? Oh ben, en chariot, c'est comme en moto, quand tu doutes.... Laisse passer.
Sinon j'ai un auter truc à te montrer. A la radio, on a un dessinateur... Si si... Mister Roméo. Il est hyper doué. Je vous laisse voir ça... /!\ Warning /!\ Peut choquer les âmes sensibles !
Si quelqu'un croise Roméo, il peut lui dire qu'il est en guest star involontaire sur mon site sans prob. Je ne commenterai pas cette image... Mais elle me plait bien :D
Phrase du post : Si la Tiff’s touch c’est l’opium des fous, alors là oui, je crois que je suis déjà camé jusqu’à l’os… [Hélios] ;)
Bon weekend !
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